Don’t believe me? Look at this Passport photo I took for my job in Japan.
The CVS passport guy thought I was raising an eyebrow to try and seduce him… I wish that were the reason. Apparently, one of my eyebrows is just permanently fixed two inches farther up on my forehead than the other. And let’s not even mention the lazy eye. Too late.
By the way, that dotted line took me 30 minutes to make, and I’m weirdly proud of it. Also, what is with that face I’m making? It looks like I just ate my coworker’s leftover Chinese food, and I know I’m going to get away with it.
I keep accidentally scrolling back up past the photo and scaring myself.
I actually realized this disfigurement years ago, when one afternoon I was primping myself in the bathroom (do NOT judge me) and one of my cousins came in to ask me something (because we have no boundaries). All it took was one look at my reflection before my cousin screamed out in horror. But, she’s also just really dramatic…
The odd thing is, the eye-height discrepancy only appears in photos and mirrors. In person, they are completely level. The phenomenon reminds me of those online optical illusions where you really want to see what happens, but you know that at any second something could jump out at you.
Don’t know what I’m talking about? Here, Enjoy:
I guess it could be worse. Like if I was a cyclops or something.
I feel that it’s necessary that I redeem myself with a better photo. Mostly, because I realize that looks are slightly important, and I don’t want that picture to cause me to lose any readers. So here is another of me from my nephews 6th birthday party. It was pirate themed.
Alright, here you go.
Although, as you can see, the eye thing perseveres.
Thank you for reading, as always.